Ok so if you didn’t know we’ve got Bonnie Tyler representing the UK this year. Its a pity I couldn’t have done a roadtrip last year when we had Englebert Humperdinct singing in Azerbyjan. Purely because I would have loved to drive all the way with a sign on the back of the car saying “Honk for the Hump”. Just to share the Eurovision love with fellow Eurovision fan drivers, so they could encourage me on my drive. That would have been brilliant.

Anyway, back to our Bonnie. Her biggest bits have been Total Eclipse of the Heart, Its a Heartache and Holding out for a Hero. I think she might have also sang Bright Eyes from that “cartoon” about the rabbits with the scary eyes were the blood comes over the hill. Can’t remember the name of it, but it scared the pants off me when I was little. Mind you, I had a sheltered childhood – was never allowed to watch Jaws incase it gave my brother nightmares, so a rabbit called Captain VonKinkerhoff or whatever with scary red eyes is about my limit of what can be watched without hiding behind a cushion.*

I digress again. Back to Bonnie. All in all she’s a bit of a poor man’s Barbara Striesland. I’ll explain here:

Not quite good enough for Eurovision though. She needs an airbrush. Both sorts.

Now get to stand outside somewhere looking wild and free, throw in some dramatic arm movements and you’re sorted!

Eurovision here we come!

* Talking about rabbits reminds me of something funny I just remembered from my French GCSE. I was good at Science, maths and English but really struggled with French. Hated it with a passion. Got into a right state of panic for my oral exam and despite learning loads of possible questions and revising answers, nerves just got the better of me. So when asked what did I do for in the holidays I confidentally replied “Je suis allé au Pays de Galles avec mes copains” (I went to Wales with my close friends) except that wasn’t actually what I said. I said “lapins” instead of copains – “I went to Wales with my rabbits”. Strange look off the examiner but she carried on and kept a straight face.